No, the Sox are not the Twins

Now that the Twins’ open-air production of “Who’s the Boss?” has ended its three-night run at the Cell, the Sox can begin sifting through the debris.

Check that. The Sox still have some baseball games to play, as mandated by the MLB rulebook. So for now, it’s up to the fandom to play the game of “Where did it all go wrong?” (No fair blaming everything on Joe West. Leave that for Hawk to do.)

The better question is: Why are the Twins so much better than the Sox?

It’s a question that’s been asked frequently in recent years. It’s a question Ozzie Guillen desperately tried to answer before this season began.

Didn’t Ozzie try to shape the 2010 White Sox into something more Twins-like? There was the emphasis on speed and fundamentals, on improved defense, on more flexibility in the lineup (see: DH by committee).

Trouble is, OzzieBall isn’t the best fit for the homer-happy Cell. And, oddly enough, Ozzie might not be the best manager to oversee OzzieBall. After all, Ozzie is the manager who likes to bunt Juan Pierre over to second base, even against pitcher-catcher combos that have little chance of throwing out Pierre on steal attempts. Ozzie also is the manager of the team that gets caught stealing more than any other. And Ozzie is the manager of a team that has committed 89 errors (compared to the Twins’ 65).

So, no, OzzieBall hasn’t done the trick.

Long in the tooth and slow afoot as Jim Thome may be, was there anyone other than Ozzie who thought Mark Kotsay was the better choice to be the Sox’s big lefty basher? Consider how much production Twins skipper Ron Gardenhire has gotten out of Thome this season, judiciously picking his spots to use him. Compare and contrast that to Ozzie picking his spots to use Kotsay (.236 batting average) and Andruw Jones (.228).

Consider how the Twins never blinked after losing former MVP Justin Morneau and star closer Joe Nathan, and don’t even think about whining about how the Sox lost Jake Peavy and how the bullpen has had its share of injuries.

It’s too easy to lay all the blame at Ozzie’s feet. Players throughout the lineup and in the starting rotation went through horrendous slumps. Kenny Williams swung and missed with the additions of Jones, Mark Teahen and Manny Ramirez (and with his failure to convince Ozzie that bringing back Thome was a good move). Carlos Quentin was a bad fit in right field and is maddeningly streaky at the plate.

Maybe we should think of it this way: The Sox were nowhere near as good as the Twins to begin with, but they were able to contend for a while thanks to the guy who wears No. 14. The same guy who got hit in the face in his first at-bat Thursday night, refused to come out of the game and then homered on the first pitch he saw in his second at-bat. Paul Konerko is a man’s man, a superb leader and a guy who gives the game everything he has.

If Sox fans need any more misery this week, all they have to do is imagine Konerko wearing a Twins uniform.

A sweep of Twins might win us back

I know we’re all giddy with Bears Euphoria after the Monsters of the Middle Screen won their opener in a fashion that left no doubt as to their championship viability.

But let’s put off the Super Bowl party planning just a little while longer — at least until the White Sox and Twins have finished this week’s important series (that just a few weeks ago figured to be so much more important).

Sure, the Sox are six games behind the Twins with 19 games left to play, giving them a 3.5 percent chance of making the playoffs, according to some formula ESPN uses. But considering the thrills the Sox provided by roaring into the race beginning in June, we shouldn’t be waving the white flag just yet.

Simply put, if the Sox sweep the Twins in the three-game series that begins Tuesday night at the Cell, they’ll be three games out of first. And that would quicken a few pulses.

The pitching matchups are good ones:

Tuesday: Liriano (13-7, 3.24 ERA) vs. Danks (13-10, 3.54)

Wednesday: Duensing (8-2, 2.02) vs. Floyd (10-12, 3.92)

Thursday: Pavano (16-11, 3.47) vs. Buehrle (12-10, 3.99)

A Sox sweep looks unlikely, especially since the Twins have won 13 of their last 16, while the Sox have lost four of their last six. But this has been a head-scratcher of a season, so let’s throw logic and all the percentages out the window.  

The Sox have been nothing if not resilient this season, with the latest example coming Sunday. Trailing the Royals 6-0 in the first inning, only to storm back for a 12-6 win? All right, maybe that one’s not such a shocker, considering the pitchers K.C. kept sending to the mound. But come on; this team does have some fight in it, with Paul Konerko supplying the biggest blows.

In any case, the Sox know what’s riding on this series against the Twins:

Win two of three and you’re five games back with 16 to play. Not promising.

Win one of three and you’re seven games back. Ouch.

Get swept and you’re nine games back, and the Brent Morel era immediately begins in earnest.

But a sweep? That might convince the average fan to put his Matt Forte jersey back in the closet and proudly wear the Konerko shirt for a few more weeks.

Right off the bat, Manny is being Manny

Manny Ramirez and Omar Vizquel celebrate Tuesday
night's White Sox victory over Cleveland.


Already it's become clear why Kenny Williams rolled the dice on Manny Ramirez:

Manny is the most feared on-deck-circle guy in baseball.

Tuesday night, Manny was on deck getting ready to pinch hit in the ninth inning of a 1-1 game. Result: A.J. Pierzynski crushed a three-run homer that lifted the Sox to a 4-3 victory over Cleveland.

Wednesday, Manny was on deck in the eighth inning of a game the Sox trailed 4-2. Result: Paul Konerko crushed a three-run homer that lifted the Sox to a 6-4 victory over Cleveland.

And so it has begun, the Dreadlocked Drive to the playoffs. Manny's mere presence has guaranteed glory.

Hold on there, Fertility Drug Breath. We're going to need a larger sample size.

Manny never did bat in Tuesday's game, getting pulled back after A.J. hit his decisive home run. The Sox didn't want to impose upon Man-Ram after he had endured that exhausting flight from the West Coast to Cleveland.

So Wednesday's game became Manny's official Sox debut, and good old No. 99 delivered a 1-for-3 day (groundout, strikeout, bloop single and hit by pitch). Oh yeah — and that whole on-deck-circle intimidation thing.

Two wins since Manny joined the club, but my reservations about the acquisition have grown. First, I'm not buying into any magical "on-deck effect." Is Konerko really going to see better pitches just because Manny is on deck? Pitchers are going to fear Manny more than Konerko, who has put himself in MVP contention?

What really galls me — but doesn't surprise me — is that Manny immediately put himself above the rest of his teammates by neglecting to trim his locks to meet team standards, and apparently begging out of Tuesday's starting lineup. (Yeah, we know how taxing DH-ing can be, especially after a plane flight.)

Manny actually began playing games within minutes of putting on a Sox uniform. His pregame session with the media Tuesday was surreal comedy. He employed a weary-looking Joey Cora as his translator and responded in Spanish to reporters' questions — even though Manny is known to have a good grasp of English and has spoken it well in many previous interviews. But no matter. I'm sure Cora had nothing better to do. Besides, the strategy enabled Manny to more easily dodge a few tough questions about his controversial past.

Through all of this, Ozzie Guillen is revealing his true colors. Ozzie has talked about no player being bigger than the team. Ozzie has talked about how he makes the rules.

But along comes Manny being Manny, and Ozzie in essence says: "What do you want me to do about it? I can't control what Manny does."

Spineless. Hypocritical. Unfair to the team's good soldiers, such as Konerko.

But what do I know? The Sox are 2-0 with Manny in uniform. And there are plenty of on-deck appearances remaining.

And, unfortunately, there are much more urgent concerns in SoxLand. Freddy Garcia left Wednesday's game with an injury, Gordon Beckham's return to the lineup has been pushed back and the broken-down bullpen situation is desperate.

Maybe we should be thankful to have Manny to distract us from those things that really matter.

Manny problems ahead for Sox?

We all know that Manny Ramirez brings a lot of baggage to the White Sox. Here are some potential ugly scenarios I'm most worried about seeing:

-- Hawk Harrelson shows his support by sporting dreadlocks.

-- Teeny-weeny Juan Pierre plays a practical joke by hiding in Manny’s ridiculously baggy pants, but it goes horribly wrong when Manny slides into second base.

-- First we excused bad behavior by saying, “It’s Ozzie Being Ozzie.” Now we’ll have to get used to saying, “It’s Manny Being Manny.” Next: “It’s Brent Lillibridge Being Brent Lillibridge.”

-- Oney Guillen becomes Manny’s Twitter tutor.

-- Andruw Jones and Mark Kotsay, incensed over seeing their at-bats dwindle, walk out on the team. Wait … that one’s a good thing.

-- Manny hits .295 with five homers and 14 RBI in his month with the Sox, so they decide to retire his number and build a statue in his honor.

In all seriousness, I’m not thrilled about Manny joining the Sox. Intrigued? Of course. Who wouldn’t be? There’s rarely a dull moment in MannyWorld.

But this guy represents so much of what you don’t want in a teammate: A drug policy violator (50-game suspension last season); a one-man M.A.S.H unit (three DL stints this season); a first-ballot entrant in the Me First Hall of Fame. Was it just me, or did Paul Konerko — a first-class guy and the team captain — sound awfully wary of Manny when questioned by reporters in the last week or so?

Can Manny go on a hitting tear and lead the Sox into the playoffs? He did it for the Dodgers by hitting almost .400 after coming over from Boston in 2008. But that was over the span of 53 games; the Sox have 32 games remaining heading into Monday’s game in Cleveland. Can an older and more broken-down Manny approach that lightning-in-a-bottle performance? Doubtful.

Yes, desperate times call for desperate measures. But hitting hasn’t been the Sox’s problem during their recent slide. I wish Kenny Williams had traded for bullpen help, as the Twins did (twice). I wish it didn’t feel like Kenny has made a deal with the devil — a devil who comes with a $4 million price tag for a month’s work.

In any case, Manny will don his Sox uniform Tuesday night, and most of Sox Nation will be riveted.  And no, I won’t be able to look away.

Frankly, losing this series was a big hurt

It’s no surprise the Sox soon will be unveiling a Frank Thomas statue. Frank was diligent in posing for it all those years while playing first base.

I kid, of course. But I’m not sure Ozzie was kidding when he said in a taped presentation for Frank Thomas Day on Sunday, “Frank, you were a great hitter, but not a great player.”

Oh, Ozzie. You always know exactly the right thing to say. Stay classy.

Ozzie and more than a few Sox fans packed into the Cell probably wished the Big Hurt could have picked up a bat in the late innings Sunday. The Sox just couldn’t get anything going against Yankees starter Ivan Nova and a who’s-who of colorful relievers: Boone Logan, Kerry Wood, Joba Chamberlain and Mariano Rivera. It was as if Sox hitters had used all their fight in Saturday night’s slugfest, a 12-9 loss that had the makings of one of those comeback wins that lights a wildfire.

So, all the good vibes generated by the retiring of the Big Hurt’s number were wasted Sunday, as was a terrific outing by Gavin Floyd. The Sox fell 2-1, losing another series (that’s six of their last seven) and going 3-3 on the homestand.

Thanks to the Twins losing to Seattle on Sunday (Carl Pavano’s mustache is at half staff), the Sox remained 4 ½ games behind in the Central. Next up is a 10-game road trip (3 in Cleveland, 3 in Boston, 4 in Detroit). Meanwhile, the Twins are about to begin a nine-game homestand, hosting Detroit, Texas and Kansas City.

The Sox bullpen came out of the weekend even more battered than before, with the loss of the surprisingly effective Erick Threets. The good news is that Bobby Jenks is pitching well again (though it would be nice if he could make the routine throw to first base and spare us some unnecessary drama). And it looks like Matt Thornton and J.J. Putz will be able to return to action as soon as they’re eligible to come off  the DL. That means Wednesday for Thornton and Sept. 9 for Putz.

Terrific starts by Freddy Garcia and Floyd are encouraging signs, but John Danks is starting to become a concern. Two of his last three starts have been real stinkers. Again, for the Sox to have a chance, the starting rotation has to lead the way and go deep into games.

Line for the Edwin Jackson Fan Club forms here

Has there been a major league starting pitcher any better than Edwin Jackson since the Sox acquired the 26-year-old right-hander at the end of July?

With his sparkling performance Thursday night in an 8-0 romp over the Orioles, Jackson improved to 2-0 with an 0.96 ERA in his four Sox starts. He struck out 10 Thursday on the heels of an 11-K effort in his previous start. He has 34 strikeouts in 28 innings as a South Sider, and he's walked seven.

Kudos to Kenny Williams for picking the right replacement for Jake Peavy.

The question is: Will it mean anything for the 2010 season?

With the Twins hanging on to beat Texas on Thursday, the Sox remain 3 1/2 out of first place. And while the Sox host the powerful Yankees this weekend, the Twins are visiting the woeful Mariners. Suffice to say, we'll know a whole lot more about what this season holds come Sunday night.

What we do know is that no team would want to face the Sox in the playoffs, not with the prospects of facing Jackson, Buehrle, Danks and Floyd. (Sorry, Freddy: You'd be relegated to long relief.)

And if the 2011 rotation were to feature a healthy Peavy, Buehrle, Danks, Floyd and Jackson, you'd have to label it one of the strongest starting staffs in Sox history.

Ooops. Getting ahead of ourselves, aren't we? Reality of the here and now says the Sox have to overcome Freddy's fall-off and the hobbled bullpen if they're to have any hope of catching the Twins. It sure looks like Edwin Jackson will give them a fighting chance.

Bobby bails out a battered bullpen

There's no player who tests the patience and divides loyalties of Sox fans more than Bobby Jenks. His wild ride of a 2010 season has been enough to make you pull out your bleach-blond goatee hairs one by one.

Bobby had no business making an appearance in Tuesday night's game against the Orioles. Not with the Sox having taken a 7-2 lead into the 9th. Not with Jenks having pitched a career-high three innings on Sunday.

But sure enough, Sergio Santos quickly turned that 7-2 lead into a 7-5 margin, and J.J. Putz promptly threw three consecutive pitches out of the strike zone before once again determining he was too injured to continue.

And so, with Matt Thornton sidelined, Tony Pena unavailable and Chris Sale in the dugout after having closed out the 8th, it was left to Bobby to save the day — with runners on first and third, no outs and three balls on Ty Wiggington.

One nifty double play started by Jenks and one fly out to center later, and the Sox had survived, 7-5, and had cut Minnesota's division lead to 3 1/2 games.

Hey, Bobby: We loved you all along.

Sox Nation has to hope Jenks' back problems are behind him, so to speak, because Bobby just might have to carry the load for a bullpen that's losing key parts as it careens down the stretch drive.

Thornton and Putz are headed for the DL, with reinforcements from the minors on the way. You can speculate all you want on whether Manny Ramirez would be a good fit in the Sox lineup, but that seems a rather minor concern compared to what's happening with the bullpen.

The Sox wouldn't be in contention were it not for the sensational contributions of Thornton and Putz, and the simultaneous loss of both is a huge blow. The surprisingly rapid rise of Sale eases the sting a bit, but that's countered by the sudden drop-off of fellow rookie Santos. Based on his recent heroics, Pena could play a key role, and Scott Linebrink ... well, who really knows?

Ultimately, much of the burden falls on Jenks to regain first-tier closer status. And don't be surprised to see Ozzie stay with his starters longer than he might prefer, though that hasn't worked out so well in the past (right, Gavin Floyd?).

Meanwhile, I'm not rooting for Me-First Manny to join the Sox. We already have a sometimes hard-to-love player who needs all our affection. I'm looking at you, Robert Scott Jenks.